John Pearson's Buckets Blog

Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings: 2021 Day-to-Day Calendar

Issue No. 451 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting features a laugh-out-loud 2021 day-to-day calendar that exposes all your lame meeting clichés! LOL! And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies) and if you missed it, read my June review of Practicing the Present: The Neglected Art of Living in the Now.



2021 Calendar Mocks My Meetings Bucket

News flash! It appears that Year 2020 will never end.

Solution! Order this 2021 Day-to-Day Calendar immediately—and start living in the future. (You’re welcome!)

My 2021 joke-a-day calendar just arrived—and I can’t stop laughing! To be clear— I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS 2021 CALENDAR—but I did buy it, and I can’t stop laughing. I’ve already read every punchline from January 1 to December 31—and even with my mask and my muffled laughter, I already feel better saying goodbye to 2020.

I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS 2021 CALENDAR. Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings (2021 Day-to-Day Calendar) makes a mockery of my Meetings Bucket. This daily calendar is irreverent. It abuses agendas, disparages decision-making, and its cheeky arrogance is contemptuous. I couldn’t stop laughing. Here’s why:

MEANINGLESS METAPHORS:
• January 4: Use sports metaphors. “If something is great, say it’s a home run. Tell the team to skate to where the puck is going to be and keep the ball rolling until you throw in the towel.”
• January 12: Ask, “Will this scale?” no matter what it is. “No one even really knows what this means, but it’s a good catchall question that drives everyone nuts and definitely makes you look smart.”
• January 18: Ask if this is a crawl, a walk, or a run. “No matter what idea is being discussed, it’s always good to ask if this is a crawl, a walk, or a run. For bonus points, ask when the team will be able to fly.”

WHITEBOARD WIZARDRY:
• January 28: Focus on the vision. “Go to the whiteboard and write the word ‘vision’ with a circle around it. Remind everyone that everything we do must revolve around vision.” (Ouch! See my recent issue on vision!)
• April 23: Ask everyone to think outside the box. “Go up to the whiteboard and draw a box. Say, ‘We don’t want to think inside the box.’ Now draw an arrow pointing outside the box. Ask, ‘How can we think outside the box?’”
• May 14: Talk about the back end and the front end. “Write ‘back end’ and ‘front end’ with an arrow connecting them on the whiteboard. Say ‘We just need to hook up the back end to the front end.’ You’ll seem very technical.”
• December 10: Say we need to focus on customers. “Go to the whiteboard and draw a few stick figures. Circle one of them and say, ‘This is Lucy. Lucy’s a Mom. What does Lucy want? Who cares. What do we want? That’s a trick. What does Lucy want?’”

POWERPOINTS & PRESENTATIONS:
• January 26: Ask the presenter to go back a slide. “This will immediately make you look like you’re paying closer attention than anyone else. Then, after staring at the slide silently for several seconds, say ‘Ok, we can move on.’”
• October 2/3: How to become a keynote speaker. “Step 1: Put ‘Keynote Speaker’ in your bio. Step 2: You’re done.” (Note: The two-day weekend pages are hilarious!)
• September 25/26: Meeting Achievement Sticker. “Did you go to a meeting this month where you successfully projected your screen on the third try? Congrats! You get a sticker!” (The sticker reads, “Successfully projected my screen on 3rd try.”)

TRITE TIPS:
• January 5: Suggest a walking meeting. “Say you enjoy walking meetings because they clear your mind, just like they did for Steve Jobs. Now people will think you’re as smart as Steve Jobs.”
• January 11: Give your meeting a fun name. “When scheduling your meeting, call it something like a touchbase, powwow, huddle, sync session, roundup, tagup, or thought shower. This will throw people off the scent that this is going to be an excruciating meeting.”
• July 1: When taking meetings in Canada, apologize a lot. “Normally, apologizing is a sign of weakness, but saying you’re sorry in Canada is just how they do things. Start every sentence with ‘Sorry,’ and you’ll gain their trust in no time.”

REMINDER: I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS 2021 CALENDAR. And one caveat—before you buy it for co-workers and friends, there may be a few days, with a few inappropriate words, you’ll want to delete from the calendar. (Hey! Why is March 4 missing?)

To order from Amazon, click on the title for Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings (2021 Day-to-Day Calendar): How to Get by Without Even Trying, by Sarah Cooper

YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS:
1) Numerous "meeting tricks” in this calendar are Zoom-meeting-hilarious! Check out November 3, “On a conference call, ask, ‘Who’s speaking?’ If someone starts talking without announcing who they are, interrupt them with, ‘Who’s speaking?’ Remind everyone to identify themselves before speaking, and you will be seen as a true leader.” Suggestion: at the start of every Zoom meeting (or in-person meeting), ask a team member to read their favorite meeting trick from this calendar.
2) July 9 has its own trite bite. “Randomly alternate between agreeing and disagreeing. No one should be able to predict if you’re going to like or approve of anything. You know, like how it is with anyone in leadership.” Yikes! Seriously now—is your leadership based on a set of values so team members can regularly predict your response? 
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“No one told me that when I wear a mask, only my mask receives love.”
Insights from Mastering the Management Buckets Workbook

One of the top book recommendations in the Team Bucket is The Cure: What If God Isn’t Who You Think He Is and Neither Are You, by John Lynch, Bruce McNicol and Bill Thrall. My favorite insight: “No one told me that when I wear a mask, only my mask receives love.”

Good news! The latest resource from the Trueface Team has arrived! Two Roads: A 4-Part Group Study of The Cure is a resource-rich small group combo of book study, video, and audio—perfectly packaged for this COVID-19 season.

And to be clear, I DO RECOMMEND THIS STUDY and it’s the perfect length—just four weeks.

Week 2 asks, “What mask am I wearing?” (How did the authors know so much about masks—writing before COVID?!) In the application section, the Trueface Team suggests this:

“Set aside time every morning before you start the day with a prayer asking God to help you take your mask off. Think about the mask you most often wear, then remind yourself, ‘That’s not who I really am. I don’t have to pretend to be that person.’”

To order from Amazon, click on the title for Two Roads: A 4-Part Group Study of The Cure, by The Trueface Team. Trueface equips people “to experience the freedom of living beyond the mask.” Click here for more information.

P.S. And if you’re a big Los Angeles Dodgers baseball fan during this World Series (like John Lynch), you’ll appreciate another Trueface resource. Read my review of On My Worst Day: Cheesecake, Evil, Sandy Koufax and Jesus, by John Lynch.
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JASON PEARSON: UNEXPECTED CREATIVE. If your staff or customers are faking it in meetings—to appear interested in your products, programs, and services—you need communication tools with substance (not whiteboard trickery). Contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod Media (branding, digital, print, and video).
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Your Weekly Staff Meeting is emailed free one to three times a month to subscribers, the frequency of which is based on an algorithm of book length, nap duration, and client deadlines. We do not accept any form of compensation from authors or publishers for book reviews. As an Amazon Associate, we earn Amazon gift cards from qualifying purchases. PRIVACY POLICY: Typepad, Inc. hosts John Pearson's Buckets Blog. We use Mailchimp as our marketing platform for Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews. By clicking (above) to subscribe, you acknowledge that your information will be transferred to Mailchimp for processing. Learn more about Mailchimp's privacy policy here.

Doesn't Hurt to Ask: Using the Power of Questions to Communicate, Connect, and Persuade

Issue No. 450 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting features a definite nominee for my 2020 book-of-the-year honors. In this eNews, I’m going to persuade you to read Trey Gowdy’s new book on persuasion. (See how I did that?) And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies) and if you missed it, here’s my May review of Non-Obvious Megatrends.

Trey Gowdy’s Persuasion Mistakes

Trey Gowdy, who served eight years in Congress (2011-2019), confesses, “The mistakes made early in my career were many and largely rooted in two areas: not understanding the dynamics of persuasion and not understanding the nature and characteristics of those I was try to persuade.”

I thought I knew a thing or two about persuasion—because I’ve been “persuading” people my entire life (or so I thought): family, friends, staff members, board chairs, board members, donors, clients, airline check-in desks (any upgrades?), and more.

Yikes! Then I read Trey Gowdy’s hot-off-the-press book, Doesn't Hurt to Ask: Using the Power of Questions to Communicate, Connect, and Persuade. Apparently, I’ve been arguing, imposing my will, machine-gunning facts, interrupting, and worse—but not persuading!

Now I realize…I knew nothing about persuasion—but, gratefully, Trey Gowdy’s graduate level course in the precise practice of persuasion has seriously inspired me! I predict his book will dramatically change your thinking about how you persuade others. It’s already changed my thinking. Gowdy’s book has some very stiff competition, but it just might be my 2020 book-of-the-year—it’s that good.

Practice Makes Persuasion. As a former state and federal prosecutor, Trey Gowdy noted that his young litigators “needed two things: confidence and practice. We didn’t start in the courtroom. We started in the conference room. I would have them stand up and convince me to go see their favorite movie. That was the challenge—convince me that your favorite movie is worth my time.” (Try that at your weekly staff meeting—and then inspire your team to read Gowdy’s book.)

Divert and Deflect. In the section, “Plan and Prepare for Your Strengths and Weaknesses,” Gowdy urges you to spend serious prep time on the topic, “What do you least want to be asked yourself?” When stuck, Gowdy’s Plan B is to ask “unusual questions that divert and deflect.”

If it’s still not going well, he employs two tricks—but he warns: “They are both extreme.” The first trick: silence. “Silence is the greatest attention grabber in the world.” This one powerful paragraph will come in handy soon, I’m sure! “Learn the timing of silence—longer than a breath but not long enough that others think it’s a nap.”

The second trick: filibuster. “We are taught not to interrupt. We are taught to listen.” But he adds, “The most difficult witness to examine in Congress and in courtrooms are those witnesses who . . . simply . . . will . . . not . . . stop talking. Juries do not like rude people who interrupt and they certainly do not like to be interrupted.”

Master Your Favorite Persuasion Tool. After detailing dozens of that’s-a-great-idea persuasion tools and techniques—generously illustrated with memorable stories inside Congress and the courtroom—Trey Gowdy concludes with this:

“Just as you should identify your best communications gift, you should also identify your favorite persuasion tool. Which of the tools we have discussed would you enjoy most being highly skilled at? Which one could you see yourself mastering?”

Oh…If I Could Only Replay My Videotape! While genuinely inspired about mastering my favorite persuasion tools—the book brought to mind my inept persuasion performances in at least 10 real-life situations. Arrrgh! If Gowdy had only written this book 20 years sooner! For practice, I’m replaying those videos in my mind—and I’m using “the power of questions” to move those emotional situations to a better outcome. Fortunately, I don’t have to persuade Our Holy God to shower me with grace. He’s already done that.

10 FAVORITES. This was tough—picking just 10 persuasive points:
#1. Favorite chapter: “There Is Such a Thing as a Stupid Question.” (Hilarious!)
#2. Favorite mentor: The mother of Trey Gowdy’s childhood best friend. In just 30 minutes with a stunning use of questions—she helped Gowdy change the trajectory of his post-college plans and his life. (Did I mention—stunning!)
#3. Favorite courtroom scene: When Gowdy repeatedly asked a one-eyed witness, “Okay, what color was the blue bag?” (You’ll LOL along with the entire courtroom!)
#4. Favorite insight: “Stupid questions are better than stupid answers.” He adds, “It’s the difference between sounding stupid and being stupid.”
#5. Favorite license plate: US SENATOR 2. Why did Gowdy’s close friend, Sen. Tim Scott, choose that South Carolina license plate? “Trey, I was stopped [by police] seven times in one year as an elected official. Seven. I want the officers to know I am not a threat to them so nothing bad happens to me. I want to be safe, Trey, and stay alive.”
#6. Favorite axiom: “The most persuasive are the persuadable.” (Convicting!)
#7. Favorite contrasts: “Persuasion is not debating.” And, “Debating is science. Persuasion is art.” And, “Debating is for the best talker. Persuasion is for the better listener.”
#8. Favorite definition: Chapter 5, “The Burden of Proof Is in the Pudding.” The scale of burden of proof—absolutely fascinating: “Consent (0%), Articulable Suspicion (20-25%), Probable Cause (35-50%), Preponderance (50.1%), Clear and Convincing (75%), Beyond a Reasonable Doubt (95%), Beyond All Doubt (Ha! Impossible.)”
#9. Favorite short course on questioning: Brilliant explanations and examples of Leading Questions and Non-Leading Questions—and when to use them. (This reminded me of the AWE question in The Advice Trap.)
#10. Favorite impeachment insights (three categories of impeachment): Impeach the facts, impeach the conclusion, or impeach the person. (See chapter nine.)

Persuasive, Not Political. Although Trey Gowdy interjects numerous stories from the House committees he served on (or chaired), including Judiciary, Oversight, Intelligence, and the Select Committee on Benghazi, this book is not political—it’s persuasive, in the same way Rumsfeld’s Rules is not political.

Did I mention this might be my 2020 book-of-the-year? Enjoy! And thanks to Dick Daniels and Jason Pearson for recommending the book. (Jason’s a big fan of the audio version, narrated by Trey Gowdy—especially the courtroom scenes.)

To order from Amazon, click on the title for Doesn't Hurt to Ask: Using the Power of Questions to Communicate, Connect, and Persuade, by Trey Gowdy. Are you a listener? Listen to the book on Libro.fm (8 hours, 52 minutes), narrated by Trey Gowdy.



SEARCH YOUTUBE: “Trey Gowdy, Power of Persuasion.” Check out the Q&A videos on YouTube featuring interviews with Trey Gowdy, including this Q&A with the Commonwealth Club (Sept. 2, 2020). And watch his persuasion approach at a pre-Fourth of July Sunday talk at Second Baptist Church, Houston (June 28, 2020). Learn why Gowdy drove two nuns from Washington, D.C. to Charlotte, N.C.!

Click here to view a Q&A on persuasion with Trey Gowdy.

YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS:
1) Trey Gowdy overcame his fear of public speaking by understanding that “there is no such thing as ‘public speaking’ because there is no such thing as ‘public listening.’” Because people process info individually—just focus, he says, on one person or one camera—whether it’s five in the room or 15,000. “Furthermore,” he writes, “most people are forgiving and will overlook (or flat out miss) mistakes.” When is the last time you’ve read a book on persuasion and effective communication? Is it time for a refresher?
2) Trey Gowdy sets the courtroom scene in Chapter 16, “How Do You Know If You’ve Got It?” Before you read his poignant closing argument to the jury in a death penalty case, he challenges readers: “Make your closing argument.” Powerful—and what a memorable weekly staff meeting you could facilitate around this “Dateline” setting. Try it! 

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YIKES! Issue No. 449 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting (Oct. 1, 2020) was not emailed to subscribers, but is posted here on John Pearson’s Buckets Blog. Read my rant: “Amazon Blocked My Review! Yikes!” Sadly, Amazon has blocked my review of a documentary film—but refuses to tell me why.
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Mastering “Cultures of Connection”
Insights from Mastering the Management Buckets Workbook

The core competency in the Culture Bucket affirms, “We strive to create a corporate culture with core values that are crystal clear. We yearn for a God-honoring workplace where grace and trust are alive and well.”

This past weekend on Fox NFL Sunday, Michael Strahan, the popular analyst and Hall of Fame member who played his entire 15-year pro football career with the New York Giants—made a startling statement. Discussing his coach, Tom Coughlin, Strahan said it wasn’t until Coughlin began connecting with his players—off the field—that the team took shape and went on to win Super Bowl XLII over the New England Patriots in 2007—Strahan’s final season.

It reminded me of the book by another Michael S., Connection Culture: The Competitive Advantage of Shared Identity, Empathy, and Understanding at Work, by Michael Lee Stallard, Jason Pankau, and Katharine P. Stallard. Click here to read my 2015 review, “Coach K's Aha Moment!” I noted that Duke University’s Mike Krzyzewski (“Coach K”) would agree that he was clueless about the power of connection—until his “Aha!” moment with his wife and three daughters around the family dinner table.

Good News! The revised, second edition of Connection Culture was published last month—and just in time! As you address the COVID-19 ripple effect, this book is needed now more than ever. The updates include additional insights and examples from organizations and companies that have mastered “cultures of connection.”

When you press “END” after your next Zoom call, reflect on Michael Stallard’s warning: “Employees who feel regularly left out, lonely, or out of the loop are not going to be able to do their best work and may not wish to.” Yikes!

To order the revised edition from Amazon, click on the title for Connection Culture: The Competitive Advantage of Shared Identity, Empathy, and Understanding at Work (Second Edition), by Michael Lee Stallard, Todd W. Hall, Katharine P. Stallard, and Jason Pankau. (And thanks to the publisher for providing a review copy.)

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JASON PEARSON: UNEXPECTED CREATIVE. In his chapter on “Repetition, Repetition, Repetition,” Trey Gowdy writes about advertising’s “Rule of Seven” and the power of “effective frequency.” For help on crafting a communication plan that leverages repetition, contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod Media (branding, digital, print, and video).
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Your Weekly Staff Meeting is emailed free one to three times a month to subscribers, the frequency of which is based on an algorithm of book length, nap duration, and client deadlines. We do not accept any form of compensation from authors or publishers for book reviews. As an Amazon Associate, we earn Amazon gift cards from qualifying purchases. PRIVACY POLICY: Typepad, Inc. hosts John Pearson's Buckets Blog. We use Mailchimp as our marketing platform for Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews. By clicking (above) to subscribe, you acknowledge that your information will be transferred to Mailchimp for processing. Learn more about Mailchimp's privacy policy here.

Amazon Blocked My Review! Yikes!

Issue No. 449 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting was not sent via email—but is only posted online here.

Amazon Says "No" to My Review of
Citizen Trump Film

Sadly, Amazon has blocked my review of a documentary film—but refuses to tell me why. My disappointment with the people at Amazon is so, so frustrating. And that’s sad, because on so many levels I’m a raving fan of Amazon.

And—get this—the multiple communications from Amazon to me are so uncharacteristic of their 14 principles (core values) as detailed on their website here and in the book I reviewed in January 2020, The Amazon Management System: The Ultimate Digital Business Engine That Creates Extraordinary Value for Both Customers and Shareholders, by Ram Charan and Julia Yang. (Read my review.)

Hang with me here—and perhaps you’ll see “customer service” from a new perspective and discern if your organization’s “walk” equals your “talk.”

SEPT. 9, 2020. I posted my review of the documentary film, Citizen Trump, on my blogsite (click here and read the second article). This informative video contrasts the character in the film, Citizen Kane (President Trump’s favorite film), with Trump’s leadership style—and the savvy use of the media. As noted in my review, the film by Robert Orlando is neither a hit piece nor a promo piece. I’ve learned that some Democrats and some Republicans are not fans of the film, but others are. My take: the film is absolutely fascinating.

SEPT. 15, 2020 (Tues. 2:17 p.m. PDT). As per my routine, I always post my book and film reviews also on Amazon’s website. But…shockeroo! It was rejected! So I emailed Amazon: “I just tried to post a review of the Citizen Trump documentary film and got this message:

‘We apologize but Amazon is not accepting reviews on this product from this account. If you would like to contact us about this decision, please email community-help@amazon.com.’”

I also alerted Amazon, in this email, that I was legit. I noted, “I have posted 409 reviews of books and videos, with 3,075 helpful votes, and 50,000+ views. My ‘Reviewer ranking’ is #14,123.”

No response!

SEPT. 19, 2020 (Sat. 8:10 a.m. PDT). OK, I thought, Amazon is busy. Maybe I should send a gentle nudge? I emailed again:

“See my inquiry from Sept. 15, 2020 (Tuesday). As of today (Sept. 19, Saturday), I have not received a response.

“If there was something inappropriate with my first review (or it violated a guideline), I’ve written a new review here, but Amazon will still not let me post it. I continue to get this message:

“’We apologize but Amazon is not accepting reviews on this product from this account. If you would like to contact us about this decision, please email community-help@amazon.com.’”

I could not post my revised review. (See below to read it.)

No response!

SEPT. 25, 2020 (Fri. 10:13 a.m. PDT). Hmmm. Even though I’m a long-time Amazon Prime Member and I can view the video for free—maybe I need to purchase the video in order to write a review.

So…I purchase the video for $1.99 and receive a confirmation email from Amazon at 10:13 a.m., and since I had already viewed the video, I clicked on the link “REVIEW THIS ITEM.”

No dice! Amazon’s ingenious “AI” must have recognized the guy who has successfully posted 409 reviews on Amazon, and thought: “Here’s Pearson, again. Block that guy!” Huh?

SEPT. 25, 2020 (Fri. 11 a.m. PDT). And now this is why (at least in the past) I’ve been a raving fan of Amazon. I find the Customer Service webpages and ask a customer service rep to call me. I enjoyed a 19-minute phone call with “Sonika S.” She was pleasant, eager to help, and very responsive to my requests.

I explained the dilemma (Amazon was blocking me from posting a review of Citizen Trump) and she agreed to go to bat for me.

She promised to call back—specifically—on Sept. 27, 2020, Sunday 8:00 a.m. Pacific Time. Wow! Finally…I’ll have an empathetic live person to help me. I love Amazon!

Note: I also mentioned to my new friend, Sonika, that—ironically—I had received a “spoofing email” this same morning at 10:28 a.m. The message looked legit (no typos!) but the “Amazon Proclamation - Account Usage Suspension” was bogus. She offered to inform the “Spoofing Dept.” I thank her. (And, I received a helpful email from stop-spoofing@amazon.com at 11:54 a.m. PDT, which I responded to. That was fast!)

SEPT. 25, 2020 (Fri. 11:32 a.m. PDT). I received a personal follow-up email from “Sonika S.” confirming the Sept. 27 call-back. (But, I had hoped not to be called “Ms. John!”)

Hello Ms. [sic] John,

This is Sonika, Thanks for contacting Amazon Customer Service I hope your [sic] having a great day.

I relayed your information to the team trained to handle this scenario. You should hear back from them in the next 1-2 business days.

Keep in mind Ms. [sic] John that I'll be calling you back within the next 24-48 hours to check about the updates of your forms, I'll call September 27, 2020, at 8am Pacific Time.

We hope to see you again soon.

SEPT. 25, 2020 (Fri. 2:14 p.m. PDT). I received a “Message From Customer Service” that, I assume, was prompted by my new friend, Sonika. This was from another new friend, “Lou C.”

Hello,

Your review on "Citizen Trump: A One Man Show" was removed because your account is related to another reviewer of this title. I’m sorry for any frustrations this may cause but our guidelines prohibit related accounts from submitting reviews on the same items.

Lou signed his email, “Best regards.” That was nice.

SEPT. 25, 2020 (Fri. 2:50 p.m. PDT). Never one to let grass grow under my PC, I responded within the hour to my new friend, Lou. I write:

Now…I’m trying to make sense of your response.

What does this mean? “Your review on ‘Citizen Trump: A One Man Show’ was removed because your account is related to another reviewer of this title.”

My proposed review was never accepted by Amazon, so it was never “removed.”

Instead, when I tried to post a review, this is the message that appeared on the screen:

We apologize but Amazon is not accepting reviews on this product from this account. If you would like to contact us about this decision, please email community-help@amazon.com.

I don’t understand how my account is “related” to another reviewer of this title. I have just one account on Amazon, and I’m a Prime Member. I am including (below) the two previous emails I sent to community-help@amazon.com (for which I never received a response).

[Note: I included the emails I had sent on Sept. 15 and 19.]

Are we still having fun with this David and Goliath story? How will it end?

SEPT. 26, 2020 (Sat. 1:47 a.m. PDT). I received yet one more “Message From Customer Service”—but this time, it’s from another new friend, “Robbie A” who thinks, apparently, this might be an IT problem!

Hello,

I'm sorry you had problems using our website. I wasn't able to reproduce the problem you had, but I'd like to report this problem to our technical team for further research.

Please write back to us with the following information:

* URL for the page where you experienced the problem
* ASIN/ISBN of the item you're trying to review, which you can find at the product page under product information
* Any error messages you received
* The operating system on your computer (for example, Windows 10 or Mac OS X)
* Your browser type and version (for example, Google Chrome)

We look forward to hearing from you.

SEPT. 26, 2020 (Sat. 6:45 a.m. PDT). Unfortunately, I was not awake when my new friend, Robbie, emailed me. But…I got up early on Saturday morning, with Great Hope, that I could continue being a raving fan of Amazon. Uh…nope!

In my 6:45 a.m. email, I responded to all of Robbie’s questions and added, “If you prefer, please call me and I can explain further.” I gave him my mobile number.

No response.

SEPT. 27, 2020 (Sun. 2:55 a.m. PDT). Wow…these Amazon people are night owls! This email was unsigned (mysterious!) but looked like it had gone up the chain a bit. I’m no longer being addressed as “Ms. John,” or “Hello,” but “Hello John W. Pearson.” Now…we’re getting somewhere!

Here’s what the “Amazon Review Moderation” department emailed me:

From: review-appeals@amazon.com [mailto:review-appeals@amazon.com]
Sent: Sunday, September 27, 2020 2:55 AM
To: john@johnpearsonassociates.com
Subject: A Message From Amazon Review Moderation

Hello John W. Pearson,

Amazon is unable to post the customer review because some of the details of this account indicate a relationship to sellers, publishers, or other reviewers of the product.

Why is this happening?
Customer reviews are meant to give customers unbiased product feedback from other Amazon shoppers. Because the goal of customer reviews is to help customers make informed purchase decisions, any reviews that could be viewed as advertising, promotional, or biased will not be posted.

Once a review is removed because it does not comply with Amazon's Community Guidelines, the account may not submit any new reviews on the same product.

If you would like to learn more, please see our Community Guidelines (https://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/display.html?nodeId=14279631).

To contact us about this decision, please email community-help@amazon.com.

Huh?

SEPT. 27, 2020 (Sun. 8:00 a.m. PDT). I’m standing by for the promised Customer Service follow-up phone call from Sonika per our conversation and her email confirmation. No call! And…I had such high hopes. My “raving fan” enthusiasm dropped a few points.

No response.

SEPT. 27, 2020 (Sun. 9:33 a.m. PDT). I took a deep breath, after re-reading the “Amazon Review Moderation” email three times. At least some anonymous soul is responding.

So…I respond to the “Amazon Review Moderation” emailer (no name) and ask several questions:

“Would you be kind enough to explain what ‘relationship’ I have that would prevent me from posting a review?”

I noted that Sonika did not call at 8:00 a.m., as promised (nor has she called yet). Then (maybe this will help?) I reiterated the series of emails—with these comments and questions:

What’s perplexing—even more—is that every communique from Amazon has listed a DIFFERENT REASON for rejecting my review. This makes absolutely no sense!
• Sept. 25, 2020 (Friday 2:14 pm PDT) – the review was “removed because…” (Actually—the review was never posted!)
• Sept. 26, 2020 (Saturday 1:47 am PDT) – “…I’d like to report this problem to our technical team…” (So…is it technical or is it about content?)
• Sept. 27, 2020 (Sunday 2:55 am PDT) – “…some of the details of this account indicate a relationship…” (So…this is a new one? What should I believe?)

I add:

There are media reports that other reviewers have been blocked from posting reviews of Citizen Trump. Something is fishy, here—would you not agree?

My suggestion: we both could save a lot of time if you would ask an appropriate person (with both knowledge and authority) to call me on my mobile phone. (I listed the number.)

This is really so simple—just unblock me and I can post the review. Whew!

Thank you for reading this!

I closed with the reminder of my Amazon Review Ranking, with 409 reviews posted, and I also noted that Amazon had invited me, some years back, to be “Vine Reviewer,” which I did for several years. (You can’t join the program, you must be invited.)

SEPT. 28, 2020 (Mon. 7:38 p.m.). I was making progress—or so I thought! But I was totally unprepared for this one-sentence response, this time from “review-appeals.” No name, no next steps. Just this take-it-or-leave-it very-un-Amazon-like customer “service” response:

From: review-appeals@amazon.com [mailto:review-appeals@amazon.com]
Sent: Monday, September 28, 2020 7:38 PM
To: john@johnpearsonassociates.com
Subject: A Message From Amazon Review Moderation

Hello John,

Due to the proprietary nature of our business, we do not provide detailed information on how we determine that accounts are related nor the related accounts.

What? Seriously? I ask a simple question about why my review was rejected and I get a one-sentence response, without the name of the email writer—and it still sheds no light on the topic? Thanks, Amazon, and have a nice day, yourself.

SEPT. 30, 2020 (Wed. 12:15 p.m.). So…is Amazon blocking me or just blocking the review of Citizen Trump, for some strange or fishy reason? To find out if they’re just blocking me, I tried to post a short review of the Cartoons from The New Yorker 2020 Day-to-Day Calendar (which I had purchased last year). Within two hours, Amazon posted the review. Success! Maybe they still love me?

But…why, oh why, will Amazon not allow me to post a review of Citizen Trump?

Stay tuned...and see you at the movies.

John

P.S. “Alexa…you’re always so helpful. How do I post a film review on Amazon?”

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My New Favorite Documentary!
SEE BELOW TO READ MY REVISED REVIEW OF CITIZEN TRUMP, in case my original review did not meet Amazon guidelines. (Amazon would not let me post this either!) The film is available on demand on Vimeo and Amazon Prime.

JOHN W. PEARSON’S REVIEW OF CITIZEN TRUMP: A ONE MAN SHOW
September 19, 2020 – 2nd try!

I’ve read my fair share of presidential biographies and histories, including The President’s Club: Inside the World’s Most Exclusive Fraternity, by Nancy Gibbs and Michael Duff. Up until this month, my favorite White House documentary has been The Presidents’ Gatekeepers (see also the book and my review of The Gatekeepers: How the White House Chiefs of Staff Define Every Presidency, by Chris Whipple).

My new favorite documentary: Citizen Trump: A One Man Show.

What a brilliant theme—exploring President Trump’s favorite movie, Citizen Kane, and then comparing and contrasting Citizen Kane with Citizen Trump.

President Trump does not survive unscathed (facts are facts), but—refreshingly—this is not a Republican nor Democrat documentary. Absolutely fascinating!

You’ll watch it again, after viewing the 1941 classic, Citizen Kane, considered by many critics, filmmakers, and fans to be the greatest film ever made.

Note: Robert Orlando is also the filmmaker behind the documentary and co-author of the book, The Divine Plan: John Paul II, Ronald Reagan, and the Dramatic End of the Cold War.

My vote goes to Robert Orlando!
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