Issue No. 413 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting highlights a just-in-time resource for parents at their wit’s end in today’s screen-saturated culture. (“Put your iPhone away!”) And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies) and check out this page for recent book reviews including Leaders: Myth and Reality, by General Stanley McChrystal (US Army, Retired).
Summer Reading List #6:
Parenting in a Screen Saturated Culture
Imagine if your kids and grandkids (and maybe you!) would read this powerful prayer every morning:
“Leave me not, O gracious Presence, in such hours as I may today devote to the reading of books or of newspapers. Guide my mind to choose the right books and, having chosen them, to read them in the right way. When I read for profit, grant that all I read may lead me nearer to Yourself. When I read for recreation, grant that what I read may not lead away from You. As with books, so also for the music and entertainment I choose. Let all my reading so refresh my mind that I may the more eagerly seek after whatsoever things are pure and fair and true.”
John Baillie (1886-1960), the Scottish theologian, wrote that prayer before Apple Computer, Inc. was founded. Had John Baillie and Steve Jobs been contemporaries, would the iPhone, YouTube, and more been included in this morning prayer?
Youth culture gurus Doug Fields and Jonathan McKee have some thoughts about this—and just in time for the back-to-school routines. (“Young man! Get off your phone! Girls—stop texting and pay attention!”)
Here’s your next must-read:
Parenting in a Screen Saturated Culture: Teaching Healthy Decision-Making to the Smartphone, YouTube, Instagram, Gaming Generation.
Doug Fields has authored more than 50 books and was the youth and teaching pastor for 18 years at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif. Jonathan McKee serves parents and youth with a mountain of resources through two websites: TheSource4YM.com and TheSource4Parents.com. Bottom line: Fields and McKee have both the credentials and the calling. When they speak or write—people listen.
Here are seven reasons you should immediately order and read this short (63 pages) workbook—if you’re a parent, pastor, youth leader, teacher, or grandparent:
[ ] REASON NO. 1: Phone Contract. Wow! The phone contract template for families on page 59 is worth the price of the book and will reduce the hollering, the anxiety, and prevent serious harm. Example: “You are not allowed to delete any texts, downloads or your browsing history. No exceptions. Come to Dad/Mom, and we will delete this for you if your phone requires it.”
[ ] REASON NO. 2: One Word—“Guardrails.” Brilliant! Chapter 4 is subtitled, “What Rules Are Actually Helpful?” and the authors have invested three chapters in building the foundation for identifying guardrails that actually work with children and youth. They tilt towards the concept of “guardrails” vs. “rules,” noting “Establishing a balanced approach to guardrails is an act of love.” The workbook format journeys families toward a destination of writing up to 10 guardrails.
[ ] REASON NO. 3: In-Your-Face. Honest! So you just told your daughter that her curfew is 11 p.m. Her response: “Why 11? Is there something magical about 11? Does the Bible say ‘Make sure your kids are home at 11?’ How come the McCains don’t make their kids come home at 11—aren’t they good parents? Why not midnight like all my other friends?”
[ ] REASON NO. 4: What If the Rules Are Broken? Hilarious! Chapter 6, “Real World Application,” is both hilarious and helpful. In the very creative “Honest Thoughts” fill-in-the-blanks sections, Fields and McKee ask, “What would you prefer to use to destroy your kids’ phones and other screens—a sledgehammer or a wood chipper?”
[ ] REASON NO. 5: Meandering With Moses. Convicting! The authors ask convicting questions: “Are you one of the 54% of parents who have never had the conversation with your kids about their online profile?” But…they don’t leave you hanging with gut-wrenching anxiety. These modern day prophets also challenge the media’s typecasting of “clueless” parents and remind readers what Proverbs says about God-honoring family values—and the “talk as you walk” wisdom from Moses in Deuteronomy 6.
[ ] REASON NO. 6: Practical, Not Preachy. Surprising! Parents, teachers, pastors, youth leaders, and grandparents already know the dangers of the worldwide web. The authors don’t waste our time dwelling on those evils or listing convent locations for rambunctious daughters. They just deliver really, really thoughtful approaches to this modern day dilemma. The workbook is amazing.
[ ] REASON NO. 7: The Doug & Jonathan Dialogue. Refreshing! The book is actually a conversation between Doug and Jonathan—and each own their opinions and approaches (and they don’t always agree). You’ll read a few lines from Doug and then a few lines from Jonathan—punctuated with many laughs and very savvy counsel.
To order from Amazon, click on the title for Parenting in a Screen Saturated Culture: Teaching Healthy Decision-Making to the Smartphone, YouTube, Instagram, Gaming Generation, by Doug Fields and Jonathan McKee.
YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS:
1) Doug Fields and Jonathan McKee suggest: “List some of the values you hope to pass on to your kids.” What values do you live by at home? What core values guide the work in our organization? (How are we living biblically in this “screen-saturated culture?”)
2) Appendix C of the Fields and McKee book includes “A Teenager’s Social Media Rules for Her Parents,” featuring Ashley McKee’s “Social Media Rules for Creepy Parents.” (It’s hilarious.) What are the implied social media rules in our organization? Should we put them in writing?
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Coach John Wooden’s 6 Values
Insights from Mastering the Management Buckets Workbook
One of the big ideas in the Culture Bucket, Chapter 8, in Mastering the Management Buckets, is to preach and live your values.
John Wooden (1910 – 2010), the esteemed UCLA basketball coach, had an easy-to-remember formula for success. It was part of the corporate culture he created on the practice court, in the locker room and on Bruin game days. According to his book, co-authored with Jay Carty, Coach Wooden: One-on-One, Wooden’s dad gave him two sets of threes when young John was in grade school:
John Wooden’s 2 Sets of 3
Don’t lie.
Don’t cheat.
Don’t steal.
Don’t whine.
Don’t complain.
Don’t make excuses.
We have all experienced corporate cultures that could use a hefty dose of Wooden’s two sets of threes. While some companies and organizations might re-phrase their core value statements on the positive side (truthfulness, integrity, accountability, etc.), the coach’s six “do not” statements are memorable and crystal clear.
Click here for more resources from the Culture Bucket, including links to more than 10 books and other resources on creating a healthy culture. (See especially my 2015 book-of-the-year, Leadership Briefs: Shaping Organizational Culture to Stretch Leadership Capacity, by Dick Daniels.)
BONUS LINK! If you appreciated the brief paragraph from John Baillie’s morning prayer (see above), click here to read the entire prayer for the 21st morning of the month. You can also order his book, A Diary of Private Prayer, with 31 morning and 31 evening prayers—and blank pages facing each prayer (for journaling). I’ve given dozens of these books to friends over the years—one of my all-time favorite books.
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JASON PEARSON: UNEXPECTED CREATIVE. Are you leveraging the extraordinary power of visual media to inspire your members, clients, or customers? Check out the innovative work from Jason Pearson at Pearpod Media (branding, digital, print, and video). Jason has his own focus group of screen-focused triplet teenagers at home—so he knows what works when communicating to the diversity of generations you serve.
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